I think I have completed this angel painting tonight. It’s done in acrylics on canvas with some gold leaf liquid stuff to make the halo. The halo is sort of bothering me, we’ll see if I go back to it. I am supposed to give this up for the Student Art Show at Ai, but I kinda doubt it will sell anyway, so I’ll probably keep it (or perhaps a Christmas gift?).
I started the little one to the right, tonight after the other was done. I have this awesome little record player, I turn on some Tori and just paint. It’s nice, but now I need more records…or perhaps I just need to use my ipod (but the player sounds so good). I need to do this every night, I do enjoy it and feel so much more zen after wards.

These last couple of months have been really tough. Actually, I guess I could say, life changing. At times I am completely fine, knowing that this is probably for the best. At other times I am freaking out, crying, angry, depressed and pretty much starting to understand that “trust” is a 4 letter word. Okay, I know it’s actually 5, but whatever! You get the idea. I will get through it, I will be independent and I don’t need anyone (except friends and family).

Lately I’ve been thinking about personal goals. Not little goals, but big ones, like things you’ve always wanted to do or accomplish. I was lucky enough to learn a little bass and play in a band. I was on the same stages as some of my favorite bands (including Prince! when we played in Indiana). But I would really love to learn piano. I have had one for years (although it’s at my parents house). I have just wanted to learn how to play for so long. I have a little keyboard here in Austin, but it’s not the same. I know basics, some chords, which key is which, how to read some music, etc. but not how to just sit and play. Who knows, maybe it will be really tough to sink into my melon, but what the heck, I got the time. So my immediate goal is to save up funds for a piano (upright, tuned and ready to go).

Also on the horizon is more roller derby. I completed the primer for the recreational league. I am really excited about this. I have my derby gear, including some Reidell skates, helmet, knee and elbow pads, wrist guards, and a mouth piece. Am I ready for full contact? No!! Eeks, I am nervous, but I figure the rec team will know when I am ready and throw me in the fire. It’s actually been pretty amazing. Lots of tough (and not so tough) ladies skating and having fun. I need a roller derby name though. There have been some thoughts on “Whorchata”, but so many people don’t even know what that is. Hm…we’ll see. Any ideas?

I downloaded the album “19″ by Adele. I liked her “Chasing Pavements” song, I mean, it’s okay. But the other night on a TV show I heard “Hometown Glory” and I loved it. I found out who it was and hey, it’s Adele! Turn it up and listen…I’m impressed.

While I was sick for about a week, I was so proud that I weened myself off of caffeine. My goal was to get off caffeine and then ween off the dark soda, then ween off light soda (Sprite or 7-up) for good. I noticed that I had to have a can of Diet Coke every day. I tried to limit myself to 1 can, but at times, at restaurants I would enjoy more than a glass. I just feel like I need to take better care of myself and this is something easy that I can do and have done before. Years ago, all I drank was water, I did it for several years, then I went to grad school and my all nighters were too hard to stay awake…so I returned to Diet Coke.

I was proud because I was now off caffeine, not craving a diet coke. I was drinking Sprite if I wanted something sweet. But then at a restaurant I thought, “oh yeah, I can have root beer!”. So I ordered myself up one and drank. I didn’t check to see if it was A&W or Barq’s. Anyway, since then I have had about 5 root beers…and at work, they only have Barq’s. Well, at my friend Mandy’s house today, she informed me that yes Barq’s has bite (caffeine). I remember arguing with a friend in the past that yes it did, but he swore it did not, and I believed him. Ugh, so yes, looking it up, while it does not have as much caffeine as Coca Cola, it still has some. Now to add to the story, I have had trouble sleeping, hm, perhaps due to the late root beer!

Am I really caffeine free if I didn’t know I was having caffeine? Ugh, so now I have to see if I need to ween myself off this too. It’s frustrating since I felt so proud and I feel I have to start again. Darn you Barq’s Old Tyme Root Beer!!

So Danny is gone for another 4 weeks, just about. I have kept really busy, taking the dog places, working late, trying to hang with friends. But I miss him, and I am sad. I could technically go hang with friends now, but I am pooped. But sort of lonely too. I’ve been taking care of his plants and I think I’ve done pretty well. I picked a large red tomato today. The band did ask if he would be free in August, not sure how long the tour will be, but…meh.
I should paint right now, but I am tired, long day at work and then I met up with Fred and took Nacho to the dog park.

Do you ever want to just move away, make a new life in a whole new country? Like see if you can make it in Ireland, or Buenos Aires, Spain, or Mathis? (I’m just kidding about the last one). I wonder at times what it would be like to live like others do. Like having to wear a scarf and mitts all the time, or being in a jungle. Not forever of course, but just to see and learn about the lives of others. I realize that since I don’t have children, I have the world at my fingertips (reminding myself that it takes cash too), but I should technically go enjoy the world or what I can of it before I get tied down with family. Not that you can’t enjoy it with family, but lets just say Danny and I aren’t in careers where money will be rolling in later. I don’t know, I am rambling now. Just wondering what I should be doing…you know?

I have to learn JavaScript for Monday’s class. Not all of it of course, but just enough to get student’s feet wet and get them coding cool stuff. At times I feel like such a failure to my students, at others I feel wonderful, I know with experience it will get better and my rough days will be less and less. I do enjoy my job and the people I work with though, I am learning so much and well, love it.

 

Okay, so now my page has a “theme”. Not sure if I like it though. We’ll give it a whirl and see if it’s for me. Oh and I have to double space so it looks good on my blog (sorry LJers). Hm, I’ll play with the code and see how it looks in my next post.

 

Church bells are ringing, it’s 7pm. There is a Catholic church near my house and every hour the church bells ring. It’s actually really nice. Sometimes they even play a song. For those of you not in ‘the know’ Catholic songs rarely change. Okay, they do change, but I could probably go into any Catholic church (except maybe a Mennonite one) and sing along. So, yes, the word tradition is taken to the extreme. Anyway, that said, they have some really beautiful songs that I remember since my wee years, and the church around the corner plays them. Everything from “How Great Thou Art” to “Eagle’s Wings” to “How Can I Keep from Singing”, it’s pretty and not too loud or annoying. And of course, they don’t chime late or too early, even if they did, they are pretty soft.

 

My mom wishes I would be a Sunday school teacher there. But I think I have way to many questions/doubts, not about the faith (go God!), but about the religion…

 

…yet I still consider myself a Catholic.

Yesterday at the Art Institute we had our “Day of Service”. Students from local organizations and charities came to the school. Organizations like Big Brothers Big Sisters and Texas Baptist Children’s Home were invited. But due to lack of prep time (put together in a week or two), only 6 kids showed up. It was fun though because with a small group, we were able to give more attention. 6 ladies showed up from the home.
The home serves children who typically are placed voluntarily by family members due to a temporary crisis in their home. Some parent(s) aren’t able to care for their children, many are incarcerated. My heart went out to the girls who came. They were all so eager to learn and have fun. They were older, like in high school (a couple in junior high). It was a good day, and hopefully we do it more often.

On a sidenote: After the young ladies had left I went to the faculty area. There an instructor and I chatted about our classes and what we are teaching this quarter. She suggested I get my PhD. While it’s inticing, I do go back and forth on the issue. On one hand I think, “Yeah! I would love to!” but on the other hand, I hate research. Well, mainly quantitative, I don’t like statistics or numbers (or should I say I don’t like reading them and doing them). I don’t mind qualitative so much, I rather gather info and put it together than gather numbers. I did leave really pondering about it. If only I could be so lucky to get another full fellowship like I did for my Masters. Hmmm, just something to think about. Oh and what should I get it in? Instructional Technology (like my Masters), perhaps with a focus on minorites and technology?

 

You see these dresses?

Those (I think) are called Safari dresses. I like these dresses, they look comfortable and nice on those tall and slender models.
Now, what do I look like in those dresses?

Okay, minus the apron, mopping accessories and the rubber gloves. Um, and is she wearing chanclas to clean? What maid service is this?!
Yeah, I look like a maid. There is nothing wrong with the maid profession, my mom cleaned hotel rooms for a while. But yeah, my idea of looking like a chic fashionista turns into me looking like I should have a name tag and asking if you need towels!

It’s almost like these Empress waist type shirts:

First of all, (with the first image) I have no idea how a curvy girl doesn’t pop out the top of it. I try one on and my husband loves it, but it’s a bit too much skin for me (unless I’m feeling saucy). On some, the Empress waist looks pretty. On me, I look pregnant!
Two styles that I’m sure have come and will probably be gone soon, that I just can’t seem to pull off.

I’m a jeans and t-shirt gal I guess. I try to get cute clothes, show a little more skin, wear heels, girly stuff like that. But man, being girly is exhausting! My twin is very girly, she has the clothes and hair combo down to an art. My curly black hair is usually very natural (that’s my way of saying I just don’t know what to do with it so I spray some curly frizz stuff on it and hope for the best). At times I ponder how it feels like to get up in the morning and just brush your hair. No need to wet it first and put some leave in conditioner. No need to wear a cap when you run to the grocery store for something. I know, I know, not all women can do that and everyone has bad hair days, but it’s almost like someone forgot to put a tag on me. You know, “Care Instructions” or a “See Reverse for Care” tag. There are several curly hair websites I sometimes look at. My favorite so far is NaturallyCurly.com.

As you can tell, I went shopping today. It’s been about several months (my mind is counting six but I could be wrong) since I have shopped. Usually I would return in a foul mood, but I think I found a couple of things that might just work (no Safari or Empress Waist items were purchased).

I think I may need to use a widget to possibly connect this blog to my other blog. I have an old one on Livejournal. I haven’t updated it in a while, but I want to… A lot of my posts were set to “Friends Only” so you might not be able to see the meaty stuff. I see that WordPress has password protection here so I might give a few friends a password in case I want to vent.
I have had that journal for years. My closest friend (besides my husband) Mandy and I used to share a type of journal in high school. We would write in a spiral and then leave it in each others locker. The other would pick it up, read it and then write their own journal. It was way cool, or at least in my mind! Little did we know that we were forerunners in the web world! The first blog! Okay, not a “web log” per say, but it was social and journaling. I am pretty sure I still have a journal or two we used. It’s probably packed away with all my other stuff.
Perhaps if I had taken that idea from so long ago, we would be rolling in the dough (and then losing it in the dot com bust). Let’s see, the web started in the 90’s. First website was created in 1991…and look how far we’ve come! Yep, that was about the time Mandy and I were putting journals in lockers.

I just noticed that Wordpress is ignoring my HTML structure (even the one it creates). The lists in my last post don’t have bullet points, what gives? Why give the option, and then not follow through?!

Also, “Superstar in my Own Private Movie” is kind of a long title for this blog, perhaps for a tagline instead. What witty and cool title can I use? Maybe something clever dealing with being a latina webbess, latina webber, latina muy fina, latina cochina…hm, gina cochina, latinista, webinista, ginagwen?

So I am eagerly looking through free Wordpress themes that I can use for my blog.

• Do I go with a cute vector art grunge style theme?
• Should I find something that matches my website? Which I need to update, like 2 years ago.
• Should I pick a theme with dark colors to show how deep I am, or light and bright to show my fun and witty side?
• Is there a way to download a theme and then edit the parts you want? I don’t know since I can’t decide on one!
• I’m sure I could make my own, but how…do I have to do it in the next few minutes before I go to bed?

Oh Wordpress, how much time I will waste on you!

More questions I am asking myself:

• Exactly what will I put on this blog? Work and web design related information?
• Since everyone can read this site, how much personal information (like photos) should I allow?
• Will I have anything interesting to write about?
• More than that, will I keep up with this blog?

Hm, questions to ponder in dreamland.